Water your own tree this year

Our roots need special attention this year. 

I don’t consider myself a nostalgic person. From time to time I have moments when I enjoy immersing in memories from past times, but my mental training kicks in fast and reminds me that those times cannot be recreated as they initially were. Thus so far I could easily come back to reality and enjoy it as it is.

Well, towards the end of last year it was different. Mid December I was usually preparing for my biyearly visit to my country of origin, where my family and my oldest friends live. For many years in a row, I firstly travelled to the capital, spent a few days there with my partner and some of my friends and then travelled for the winter holidays to my parents’ home, where I lived for 19 years.

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If you prefer to listen to this article instead of reading it, I recorded it for you at the end of this page.

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During last year’s winter vacation I decided not to travel, as I preferred avoiding the risk of getting ill and maybe infecting my family as well. And, although in the past three years I spent one of the holidays somewhere else, not with my parents or my sister, in December I felt carried away by the old travelling routine to my home-country, where I would spend each Christmas. I was caught by surprise by my nostalgic feelings: I missed persons I wouldn’t necessarily contact to let them know I was in town; I missed going to a shopping mall where I used to buy my last-minute presents, although at that time I didn’t really enjoy the crazy run through the crowded shops; I even missed my native town, even if I eventually found it boring every time I was there.

Shortly, I probably missed a part of me that I couldn’t access as usual.

Our past is rooted deeper in the present than we think. Whether we like it or not, it is part of who we are: we wouldn’t be who and where we are today without our previous experiences. And, if we imagine our life as a tree, its roots need to be taken care of just like the branches we stretch towards the sky. The fact that the roots are hidden under the ground makes them no darker, messier or less worthy of our attention than the rest of the tree. They give us the stability we long for and they nurture the blossom that we all aim at.

So this year let’s turn our nostalgia into an opportunity to look inside. And allow the muted episodes from our past find their voice and show us what makes us feel incomplete in this prolonged isolation from our loved ones. Let’s also make more room for our native languages this year, as hearing or speaking them allows our past and present to join hands. Let’s watch family videos more often and have a look at the most embarrassing pics with our high-school gang. And laugh, cry, sing, day-dream, until we find the suitable channel for our former selves to come to light and make our days as bright as they used to be.

Yours confidently,

Corina